What do we want? Patience. When do we want it? NOW!
We live in a quick-paced instant-gratification culture. We want everything now; happiness now, success now, health now, love now. Almost all of the things and services we buy and use can be secured quickly. We can get a meal within minutes at a drive-through window, we can get lots of cool stuff from Amazon within hours. We can get our hair cut, our nails done, our cars washed, and our dogs bathed the very same day we wake up and decide those services are needed.
People are no longer interested in waiting. Long ago, we liked to watch things unfold. We stood at a window and watched people flip a pizza up in the air, we watched other people do things, We weren’t in such a hurry. We were willing to let things take a natural course. Now, we don’t have that kind of patience. And here’s the thing. We need to let some things take a natural course. We need to learn to give things the time it takes.
I agree with these words from William S. Burroughs:
“Your mind will answer most questions if you learn to relax and wait for the answer.” — William S. Burroughs
Not very many of us are willing to wait for an answer. We also aren’t very willing to wait for healing either.
I am pretty sure that if I asked how many people in here have had some sort of injury or surgery, many hands would go up in the air. I want to remind all of us of how crucial it is to give things time to heal. Healing of an injury takes time. Healing after surgery takes time. And sometimes during the healing process we find a new appreciation for our lives and we find a renewed gratitude. Sometimes we don’t. Sometimes we are just kind of grouchy while we are frustrated with the time that it takes for the healing and recovery.
How are we when the injury or the surgery happens to someone else, instead of to us? Someone that we live with? Are we patient with their infirmity, or are we a little bit impatient — waiting for them to get back to normal.
Marcie recently had thumb surgery, and I gotta tell you it’s pretty inconvenient for me. I mean, I guess it’s a bummer for her, too, but jeesh, I have to do a lot of stuff to help her. Like I have to lift the meatloaf that she made, out of the oven. I have to fold the clothes that she laundered.
The same thing happens to us psychologically. Sometimes the injury or the wound is invisible. It’s an internal scar that someone is dealing with, and we aren’t always very patient while waiting for ourselves, or for them to recover, to get better, to get back to normal.
Patience is a virtue. You may have heard that phrase at some point in your life. What does that mean? Well, a virtue has to do with moral excellence, so I think the saying means that if you have patience you are good.
Here is one definition of patience:
“Patience is best described as a state of forbearance or restraint in the face of delay or provocation, without becoming overwhelmed by annoyance or anger. It is the ability to endure something negative that’s found its way into our environment, without letting it control our behavior.” — caffreycounseling.com
As virtues go, patience is a quiet one. It’s often exhibited behind closed doors, not on a public stage: a father reading the book for the third time to his child, a dancer waiting for her injury to heal, a teacher respectfully giving the student the time needed to complete the activity.
In public, it’s the impatient ones who we see: drivers honking in traffic, grumbling customers in slow-moving lines. And let’s be honest no one has made a movie about patience — it would be too slow.
But patience is essential to our daily lives, and it might be the key to a happy life.
I once read that patience comes from a position of power. A person may have the ability to take revenge or cause trouble, but patience brings self-restraint and careful thinking. Losing
patience is sometimes viewed as a sign of weakness.
We are patient through trying situations out of hope for what will come. We know that things won’t always be bad. We are patient with a trying person out of compassion. We choose to love that person and want what is best for him.
There is a verse in the Bible that I like a lot. It is found in Ephesians, and it reads: “Be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.” — Ephesians 4:2
There is a lot of good advice in that verse. If we are humble and gentle, we are going to get along with people better. If we are patient with each other, both parties will be calmer and more peaceful. But the nugget of that verse lies in the last phrase, making allowances for each other’s faults because of your love.
When we are exposed to the faults of others we are often impatient. Why can’t that person move faster? Why isn’t that person doing what I want him to do? Why did she mess that up? What is wrong with that kid? He is a total screw-up.
But when we make allowances — she’s probably doing the best she can. Our thinking begins to change. We are able to say: Let’s give it some time. We will get this figured out. It doesn’t have to happen today. Those are golden words that give comfort and healing. And we make allowances because we love.
We are all a little bit like that banged-up horse we have been watching this morning. Bruised, scared and untrusting. Struggling. All we need is a whisperer. Someone to come along and sit by us. Wait patiently for us as we learn to trust. Someone to not rush us. Not give up on us.
A young girl tells this story:
My dad is a beekeeper. Today, he showed me all the honey he has gotten from the hives. He took the lid of the 5-gallon bucket full of honey and on top of the honey, there were three little bees, struggling. They were covered in sticky honey and drowning. I asked him if we could help them, and he said he was sure they wouldn’t survive. I kept begging him to try to do something, and so finally he scooped the bees out of the bucket, put them in an empty yogurt container and put them outside on a bench and left them to their fate.
Naturally there were a lot of bees flying around because he had disrupted the hive with the honey collection. After awhile, my Dad called me out to show me what was happening. These three little bees were surrounded by all of their bee sisters and they were cleaning the sticky nearly dead bees, helping them to get all of the honey off of their bodies. We came back a short time later and there was only one little bee left in the container — still being tended by her sisters.
After about an hour, we checked once more. All of the bees had been cleaned off enough to fly away and the container was empty. Those three little bees lived because they were surrounded by family and friends who would not give up on them. Resolved to help them until they could be set free.
My friends, we all know people who need and deserve our help, and most of all, our patience. They need us to not give up on them — to not get so tired of waiting that we walk away. Standing by someone, giving them the gifts of time and love are the very best ways we can spend our time on this earth. Hold your horses, my friends. It makes an incredible difference. Amen.
“Patience is when you’re supposed to get mad, but you choose to understand.” — Anonymous We don’t know who wrote those words, but there is great truth in them.
In the coming days and weeks, may we all try to be more patient — not only for ourselves, but for others as well.
It was great to see you today. I hope you will all come back next week to celebrate Father’s Day with guest speaker, Mark Miller.
Have a great Sunday, and go in peace. Amen.
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